[Author’s note: we've now returned to right after Daryl met Sree in episode 33.]
Though she said nothing, Sree clearly was unimpressed with Daryl’s room. For the first time in a long while, he felt ashamed. Daryl never had been accustomed to luxury, and his time with Rin certainly did little to change that. While it would be unfair to characterize him as slovenly, he lacked the finesse with which she wore her asceticism. The moment he opened the door, he realized his mistake. No doubt, Sree would excuse herself with a polite lie and forced smile. Seeing the state of the place, he could not blame her one bit.
To his surprise, she offered a distinctly unforced smile and took Daryl by the hand. He breathed a sigh of relief when she did not drag him straight to the bed. Despite his bravado, Daryl felt rather shy around her. Not around women in general and certainly not around Rin. Just Sree. She brought something out in him, but there was more to it than that. Nor was it just fear of failing to please a woman of such obvious substance.
There was another woman. A woman who had lied to him and abused him and abandoned him and threatened to hunt down and kill him, so why did this feel so much like cheating? It infuriated Daryl. He owed Rin nothing. And he would not let that crazy bitch stop him. But stop him from what? Sree only was here because of Rin. That bartender had been right to wonder what was going on. Ordinarily, a woman like Sree never would give Daryl the time of day.
Maybe she was slumming. That word had been unknown to Daryl for most of his English-speaking life. It was Rin who used it on him in the obvious way. Well, he was fine with that. Only a fool would shun an opportunity just because it didn’t arise for a reason he liked. Every opportunity had a dubious cause. That’s why it was called opportunity. Daryl would be damned if he let someone like Rin stand in the way of the opportunity named Sree.
By now she had located the kitchen, which wasn’t difficult since the apartment only had one room. Daryl felt like he was supposed to do something other than stand and gawk, so he walked over and grabbed her around the waist. Sree seemed to like this. She twisted around in his arms, pressing against him. Daryl felt a surge of desire and was about to kiss her, but she put a finger to his lips.
Was this some sort of tease? It would be a dangerous game for a mortal woman, but Sree could do as she pleased. Maybe she would toy with him all evening and then leave once he had betrayed Rin in spirit but not act. Betray? How could he betray someone who already had betrayed him? Daryl pushed the word from his mind.
Sree gave a coquettish smile. “Why don’t we talk a bit first.” She finished pouring two glasses of water and handed one to Daryl, drawing him with her free hand to the small table in the center of the room. Tiny room, table, two chairs. He inwardly groaned. Was he turning into Rin? Sree must have had a similar thought, and her eyes laughed as she sipped her water.
“I want you to tell me about Rin,” she began.
Daryl hesitated. “Most women don’t like it when you talk about an ex.”
“In case you haven’t noticed, I’m not most women,” she observed warmly. Grinning at Daryl, she added, “and I’ll wager she’s no ex.”
Seeing his continued reluctance, Sree reached over and took his hand. “I promise, I wouldn’t ask you to tell me anything inappropriate. You won’t be betraying her. Remember, Karkov sent me to help you.”
“Discussing Rin with someone her worst enemy sent feels an awful lot like betraying her,” he pointed out.
Sree smiled. “I meant by sleeping with me.”
Daryl turned red and looked away. “I know that.”
Sree bounced in her seat mischievously. “Well, then why don’t you tell me innocent stuff. Like what your life with Rin was like.”
“Why are you so interested?”
“I’m a girl. Girls like to talk about such things,” Sree laughed. She jumped up and grabbed Daryl by the hand, leading him to the bed, where they lay side by side. He kissed her on the lips. It was a long kiss, and he could feel her squirming with delight as it stretched on. Sree looked at him longingly. “So, tell me.”
Talk about a cold shower. If there was one thing Daryl was sure of, it was that talking about Rin would ruin the moment. But there was no helping it.
“Life with Rin was not easy. She was not a patient teacher and could be very cruel. But I was the happiest I’ve ever been. And I’ll never forgive her for taking that from me.”
Sree pressed Daryl’s head into her bosom and cradled him gently.
“What a straightforward young man,” she cooed. “There’s no need to coax truths from you. You just lay them out so plainly.”
“There was nothing plain about it,” Daryl grumbled, causing Sree to smile. Without knowing why, he felt at ease with her and opened up.
Sree listened to Daryl’s reminiscences, charming in their simple candor, and frowned or laughed as each occasioned. When he was done, she gazed at him through eyes moist with tears.
“I knew this was a bad idea,” he muttered. “To speak of another woman. I’ll understand if you want to leave.”
Wordlessly, Sree kissed him and held him tight. Daryl reached beneath her blouse and caressed the softness within, but she pushed him away and sat up.
“No. I cannot,” Sree sighed.
Daryl, confused, tried to pull her back down but she shrugged him off. Finally, he sat next to her.
“I’m sorry,” he groaned.
Sree looked at him and laughed. “I’ll allow that one.”
“Was it something I did? I was … not very good?” Daryl asked in a hurt voice, his accent reasserting itself.
“No.” Sree kissed him gently on the side of his head. “Good heavens, no. Quite the opposite.”
“Then why?”
“It’s Rin.”
Daryl suddenly clutched Sree to his chest. “Don’t look for her. She will kill you.”
“Very possibly,” she agreed, with a sad smile.
“Then don’t. Run.”
“I can’t. I am tired.”
“We can run together,” Daryl pleaded. Sree gave a light laugh. “Oh, I can see why she likes you.” She squeezed Daryl’s face and then let go. With hung head, she sighed again. “One last torrid affair would have been nice, though.”
Sree appeared to be lost in thought, and Daryl did not know what to say. It was some time before she spoke again. “I wish it had been someone like you. But we cannot choose, I fear.”
Seeing Daryl’s perplexed expression, she put on a brave aspect. “Never mind all that. This simply cannot be.”
“Why not?” Daryl stammered. It made no sense, and for a moment he doubted Sree. Was she just a more subtle version of Rin? He couldn’t bring himself to see her that way. There had to be a reason, and it had to be him.
“Is it because I slept with Rin? I told you, she dumped me. I’m over her.” To his dismay, his voice reeked of desperation.
Sree laughed. “That’s doubtful, especially since you’re seeking her out.” She quickly raised her hand to silence Daryl’s impending objection. “But it’s not that.”
Her eyes shimmered with sympathy, and she placed her hand on his own. Daryl unconsciously squeezed it. “I know you will take this personally, but please try not to. I’m not being mean. This is as hard for me as it is for you.”
“But why?” He insisted, fully realizing how rude it was to press the matter.
“I told you, it’s because of Rin,” Sree quietly explained. There was a certain stoicism in her voice.
Daryl sensed that her mind was made up on the matter. He felt an intense resentment of Rin. Was that damned woman going to ruin everything? With a start, he realized that she would, unless he did something. But what?
“If you must find her, then I will help. She will listen to me,” he offered without thinking.
“No,” Sree replied. “She will not.”
“Then I will protect you!” His voice was a mixture of plea and bluster. Even as the words emerged, he realized how empty they were. But something in him wanted to protect Sree, even if she had refused him, even if she secretly despised him, even if she truly was his enemy.
His earnestness took Sree aback, and she replied with a sad smile. “It must be a difficult thing — to have will but no strength. To be little more than a wraith on the template of the world, yet aspire to affect it. I feel pity for a man such as you.”
Daryl’s expression grew cold, and she squeezed his hand. “Do not imagine I say such things from malice or arrogance. Each must bear their own burden, and I feel no less pity for my own kind. Especially those who do not know they need it.”
Though her words calmed him, Daryl was confused. Was Sree mocking him or not? He sensed she spoke with genuine sympathy, but something in him revolted against such a sentiment, however well-intended.
“I did not ask for pity, and don’t regret being me. I don’t care whether I’m strong enough. I’ll protect you anyway. What I am is what I am, and I’ll make sure it’s enough.” However complex Daryl’s world had become, one thing remained simple. He liked Sree and did not want her to end.
“You sweet, sweet boy,” she gushed and hugged him, gently sobbing. Wiping away her tears, Sree sat up primly. “I believe you. I really do. You cannot protect me, but it means a lot that you would have tried.”
Seeing that Daryl was about to interject, Sree held up her hand and spoke decisively. “I am firm in my resolve. I do not fear Rin.” She looked at him. “But you should. Her love is more terrifying than her hate.”
“I already know she wants to kill me,” Daryl nodded.
Sree once again took his hands. “No, my dear child. She does not want to kill you. But what she wants and what she thinks she wants can be very different. I cannot have you, knowing that Rin loves you. It would be … unkind.”
Daryl was silent, and Sree gave him a few moments.
“Then why all this?” he complained. “If you knew that, why lead me on?”
Sree shook her head. “I knew you loved Rin from the moment you first spoke of her, but I did not think she loved you. I did not think she could love anyone. But when you told me about your time together, I understood.”
“Loved me? She tortured and used me.”
Sree put her finger to Daryl’s mouth. “You watched her through childish eyes. Were you immortal, a thousand years from now someone would judge you through their childish eyes. And they would find you wanting, however pure you may now be thought. Rin taught you some things, but others must be learned through experience. A queen who takes a man does him a great honor, whatever the manner of the taking. That she spared you is remarkable in itself.” She laughed. “Besides, you sought her out, returned to her, were happy with her. What does that say about you?”
Daryl was at a loss for words, when a thought occurred to him. “Did she do that … with Karkov?”
Sree hesitated for a second. “No. But that means nothing. As the old saying goes, there are many ways to win a man but only one way to lose him.”
Failing to comprehend her meaning, Daryl reasoned aloud. “So I was to be her new king, but she decided to lose me instead.”
“Not yet,” Sree replied, gazing at him. “And there are no such things as kings or queens anymore, at least not real ones.”
“But why me?” Daryl insisted.
Sree shrugged. “There is no accounting for affairs of the heart,” she noted. “Karkov seems to think she fell for you because of his devices.”
In response to Daryl’s obvious curiosity, she waved her hand derisively. “I won’t trouble you with the details. It is best to leave that man his vanities. I am more of a romantic, and prefer to believe Rin was the author of her own feelings. Meeting you, I think I am right. But I admit that I can never understand what is in another’s heart. Who knows why she loves you?”
“I told her I wanted to kill her,” Daryl pointed out.
Sree offered a strained smile. “Precisely. That, I can understand.”
Aww, Daryl's like a lovesick little puppy. I can't believe he was happy when he was with Rin...